Little Sally led off: "I sold girl scout cookies and I made $30," she said proudly, "My sales approach was to appeal to the customer's civil spirit and I credit that approach for my obvious success." 44. Q: How do insurers classify a dentists mistake? Whats beautiful and natural, but gets prickly if it isnt trimmed regularly? I just got a job and am moving there soon. She informed Jim that she suffered a disease that left her breasts at maturity of a 12 years old. this jokeit couldcontain profanity. He goes into a bar and orders a shot. More jokes about: dirty Similar jokes See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes. What is it? The penguin isn't the neatest eater, and he ends up covered in melted ice cream. The other two guys are jealous, but they cant figure out his secret. 1. Husband: It was a surprise but remember that pink Lamborghini you wanted so badly? I plead and plead for it regularly. When we took them straight out of the package using our own sterile techniques both of them grew something, Shepard says. You'll be on a 30 day probationary period. ITUEN takes SEPE and smoked fish.where do you expect him to get money for beer and suya. Weirdly, I've been taking some anti-impotence medication for my sunburn. Because anywhere else it would have been called a teethbrush. Whats beautiful and natural but gets long and prickly if it isnt trimmed regularly? 38. Edit: Sorry for picking on you WV, when there appears to be numerous other states I could have equally offended with this joke. Adult dirty riddle jokes are some of the most beautifully produced, genuinely laugh-out-loud jokes. another. Q: What is it called when an astronaut gets a cavity? Some people prefer being on top, others prefer being on the bottom, and it always involves a bed. Well, I have a prostate exam coming up. An even bigger surprise they tested two brand-new, unused toothbrushes as a control. When he opened the door, he found this beautiful broad spread out, just waiting for him. Q: What did the tooth say to the dentist before he left for vacation? Q: Why does the dental staff go to the dentist with their problems? 20. A banana and a vibrator were laying next to each other on a counter, with the vibrator buzzing away. What is super hard and goes into a tiny hole? It, therefore, demands that you think of your options carefully before jumping to answering them. You get t, One day, a man with a lisp named Joseph walks into a toothbrush factory. Their employer tells them ok all you guys need to do is walk around town and sell as many toothbrushes as you can, then once the days over you come back to me and tell how many you sold, so they each get a box of to, A man answers an ad for a sales position. I don't remember her eating fish for lunch. By subscribing to this BDG newsletter, you agree to our. You fiddle with me when youre bored. What am I? The first day the manger send them out for their first try at selling toothbrushes. What am I? It's possible the child was a so-called strep carrier -- someone who carries the bacteria without showing any ill-effects, she said. How To Install Upholstery on a Rear Seat Bench, 3. Had it been invented anywhere else, they would have called it the teethbrush. She said, Yes I will marry you and learn to live with your infant penis. He searches everywhere, but can't seem to find any work. If it was from somewhere else they would call it a toothbrush! Sandy and Jim got married and they could not wait so Jim whisked Sandy off to their hotel suite and they started touch teasing, holding one 11. In these days, I couldnt keep my diesel driven one. Your butt cheeks. Anywhere else it would have been called the teethbrush, The toothbrush was invented in Alabama He freaked, "omg she's sick." He is not hungry or thirsty, because he has a bottomless bowl of fruit. Please try not to laughtoo hard and feel free to flame as much as you like-we are all likepassengers on the deck of the Titanic discussing what we're going to do whenwe get to shore.How can you tell when a mechanic has been behind your nuclear warhead? She said, "Well we just had sex, what's the difference? Rate: A: You don't let your best friend borrow your toothbrush. You ever wonder why an alligator is so angry. Ech! "Hilarious Pic" You Found Out Your Grandfather used your toothbrush, (Image).Laugh To The Toothbrush And Tissue Paper. Submitted by orthodontist Kami Hoss, D.D.S., M.S., co-founder of The Super Dentists, California. Jim ran after her to find out what was wrong. How do you know that the toothbrush was invented in Maine? Sally got up first. Whats the difference between amazing sex and this joke? Year after year, he consistently sells the most toothbrushes of anyone who works for the company, at least trebling the sales made by the guy behind him. 51. 21. 70. Q: What do you call a boat fill with dentists? The top toothbrush salesman at the company was asked by his boss how he managed to sell so many brushes. 2. How can you tell the inventor of the toothbrush was from West Virginia? People may find dirty jokes shocking or disgusting, but no one can deny they're funny as hell! RELATED: 22 Doctor Cartoons That Will Make You Laugh Through the Pain. He goes to his mother, Look mama, Im a Nazi! and she punches him in the face. Because anywhere else it would've been called the teethbrush. Q: Why did the Storm Trooper want his teeth whitened? says the second guy. Many people like these to be as long as possible, but short ones can be effective. Whats at least six inches long, goes in your mouth, and is more fun when it vibrates? The Toothbrush Salesman - BEST CLEAN JOKES | Funny Daily Jokes New Videos Daily! RELATED: 20 Chemistry Jokes Every Science Nerd Will Appreciate. Submitted by orthodontist Kami Hoss, D.D.S., M.S., co-founder of The Super Dentists, California. You have to blow it to play with it. What's long and hard and hairy on one end? Out of bad luck and very desperate, he asks to speak to the operations manager to get a job selling toothbrushes. Down on his luck and very desperate, he asks to speak to the manager of the facility, about getting a job as a toothbrush salesman. 18. Have you seen all jokes? One day, Melvin's boss calls him into his office. What am I? What do you wrap your mouth around every morning and night that leaves you feeling refreshed? In order to prove he can do the job, the man is given a box of 100 toothbrushes, and told to come back when he's sold them all. One day,they seize the opportunity to sneak into a supply closet to consummate their lust. If you achieve this goal, you will be hired full-time. 30. Follow her on Instagram @lisamariewrites4food and Twitter @cornish_conklin. Bad Jokes The following riddles and jokes were made up by BADJOKE.EXE, an MS-DOSprogram. What is it? Always something more important to me. Or, Who have I become? When I come, its news. So if anyone knows another way to remove dogshit from my sneakers id be happy to hear it. Submit your best joke here and get $25 if Readers Digest runs it. Q: What is the difference between a blonde and a shopping trolley? "I don't get it?!" Each day, two of the guys sell twenty toothbrushes each, and the third guy consistently sells two hundred. How do you know that the toothbrush was invented in Arkansas? Well, now theres a new genre to enjoy: dirty riddles with completely innocent answers. You put your hands on me and then go up and down. What is the difference between ooooooh and aaaaaaah? Anyone else would have called it a toothbrush. The bartender gives him a chance and asks, "What's up, mate? What is it? Q: What did the dentist shout in the courtroom? Edit: Sorry for picking on you WV, when there appears to be numerous other states I could have equally offended with this joke. At least I think it was Alabama. Whats made of rubber, handed out at some schools, and exists to prevent mistakes? 68. Sandy had to confess to her man about her childhood illness. Its definitely possible for them to be too long. You tie me down to get me up. I was at the grocery store the other day and there was this girl in front of me at the checkout, she had an apple, a pear, a toothbrush, a cup of pasta and a can of soup. I am dirty, people like to put their wood in me, but only Santa goes down on me. He leaves and comes back in 2 hours and says "all sold". Just ice cream. Indonesian:"There is no such thing as a tenured doctor, it can take years!!! So far I have about a dozen of them saved up. Their employer tells them, "okay, all you have to do is go around town and sell as many toothbrushes as you can, and when the day is over come back to me and tell me how many you've sold," so one each gets box from A man responds to an advertisement for a point of sale. What am I? if it was invented anywhere else it would have been called the teethbrush. otherwise it would have been called the teethbrush. If you make that goal you'll be hired on full time. To which Jane replies, "If I'd known you had more time, I would have taken off my pantyhose!". In order to prove he can do the job, the man is given a box of 100 toothbrushes, and told to come back when he's sold them all. Q1: What is the difference between a baby brush and a toothbrush? Of course the toothbrush was invented in West Virginia. After three years of research at a cost of in excess of $2 million, the French researchers concluded that the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more pleasure during sex. At least I think it was Alabama. And Madonna doesnt have one. Donald Trumps is small. 5. Throw in a lawn sprinkler! They grew the normal stuff but they did not grow strep. Q: Whats the most popular hiking trail for dentists? 63. Efefrau: OMG OMG OMG OMG! 17. Q: What are the six most dreaded words in the world? Every day, two of the guys sell twenty toothbrushes each, and the third constantly sells two hundred. Q: What's the difference between a blonde and your job? I don't remember her eating fish for lunch. Instead of actively looking for work, he likes to sit around at home. What is it? 4. What three-letter word starts with an s, ends with x, and has a vowel in the middle? Classic VW BuGs How to Install New Valve Guides in Beetle Ghia Bus Motor Heads, 2. My business is briefs. No takers? A man falls into the water and a large fish swiftly approaches him, teeth first. Let's take a look at our favorite short jokes for adults only: As far as dirty jokes go, we can safely say that size doesn't matter. ", I said, "Well, I was planning on using that toothbrush again.". 26. He even puts them both out on display occassionaly. What are they? Sometimes people lick my nuts. He searches everywhere, but can't seem to find any work. TIL that the toothbrush was invented in West Virginia 9. If it had been invented anywhere else, it would be called a teethbrush. The company's top toothbrush salesman was asked by his boss how he managed to sell so many toothbrushes. The other two guys are jealous, but they cant figure out his secret. Annoying husband Because if it was invented in the north, it would've been called a teethbrush. Q: What did the Dentist of the Year get? The couple took the new baby home. 71. During the vocabulary session, the teacher begins the lesson with the word contagious. She's also a certified personal trainer and walking coach for a local senior center. "Ouch!" the fish cried. Because anywhere else it would've been called a teethbrush. 50. What do men keep in their pants that their partners sometimes blow? Did you know the toothbrush was invented in Alabama? 2. What am I? 15. Favorite this joke. "S-s-sell everything then!" 25. Its never what you expect it to be and forces you to reevaluate the way you think (which is filthy, BTW). "This study supports that it is probably unnecessary to throw away your toothbrush after a diagnosis of strep throat," said Dr. Judith Rowen, a strep specialist and pediatrician at UTMB who worked on the study. What am I? What is soft and wet on the inside while hard and hairy on the outside? What does a woman have two of that a cow has four of? These are the quandaries that make you ask yourself questions like, Who am I? Im spread out before being eaten. My penis is the same size as an infant and I hope you could deal with that once we are married. .. 123 Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a toothbrush? Never having to buy another electric toothbrush. What am I? A dirty joke is a joke that is usually considered inappropriate because of its indecent punchline. A man took his pregnant wife to the hospital. The best part about getting older is enjoying lascivious content we would have gotten in trouble for back in high school. If it stops working, it becomes a toothbrush. 32. More jokes about: dirty, drunk, lawyer, relationship, wife A man goes into the hospital for a vasectomy. "My mom says my laughter is contagious!" The first one says, "I wanna be a plumber, so I can fix the pipes in here." In that time you need to sell at least 100 units on average each week. 45. What am I? When you're done with the breast and thighs, the only thing left is a greasy box to put your bone in. What is six inches long, sweet on the lips, and goes down better with butter? He went to the address and met with the boss. Think about it: Laughing would be a fun distraction while we wait for our name to be called. If he was from anywhere else it would be called a teethbrush. Did you know the toothbrush was invented in Brazil The interviewer is dumbfounded. Doctor: Huh, so is Stevens a foreign brand? Dirty jokes tend to be of sexual nature, make use of coarse language and can be offensive. I guess he just wanted me to know. Not a single toothbrush from 16 kids with strep throat produced the bacteria. 3 men apply for a sales job at toothbrush company. Name a word that starts with f and ends with u-c-k? Q: Why does the ant hang out at the bakery? Plenty of water, food, first aid kit, even three toothbrushes for the whole trip. 41. I come with a quiver. What is it? You stick your poles inside me. When it is her turn to pay at the checkout, the pretty cashier takes a quick look at the man's purchases and then looks back at the man. Whos the most popular guy at the nudist colony? Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a limousine? What is it? A man named Melvin works for a toothbrush company. Me: Stevens soap, Stevens shampoo, Stevens toothpaste and Stevens toothbrush. A guy loses his job and is really down on his luck. 22. Nairaland - Copyright 2005 - 2023 Oluwaseun Osewa. Anywhere else they would have called it a toothbrush. A guy loses his job and is really out of luck. Ill fill your holes when you ask me to. Otherwise it would have been called a teethbrush. The salesman, skeptical of this random person's sales ability, agreed that if the man could sell 100 toothbrushes in a day, that he could have the job. Q: Why did the dentist and her boyfriend break up? If it had been invented anywhere else it would have been called the teethbrush. If it was invented anywhere else, it would have been called a teeth brush. A: It always leaves it feeling depressed. 10. Suddenly, all this white stuff starts coming out of her mouth, nose, ears. 54. Frank finds Jane very tight and difficult to enter, but finally succeeds. 32. Arnold Schwarzeneggers is big. When the bill comes, Mike, Dave and John will do it You meet this toothbrush salesman, you ask for a job and you end up getting it. Last week, after a one night stand with a woman, she had the nerve to get up and use my toothbrush without asking first. My tip penetrates. If it had been invented somewhere else, it would have been called a toothbrush. Q: What's the dentist's favorite idiom? What is it? To diaper their skyscrapers! If it had been invented anywhere else it would have been called the teethbrush. I thought, how is this possible that no one has ever looked at this? I have been told this all my life, Shepard says. Little Johnny was in economics class and was told to sell something over the weekend and see how much money they could make. Q: Why should you be true to your teeth? If it had been invented somewhere else they would have called it the teethbrush. 129. Anywhere else theyd have called it a teethbrush. Otherwise it would have been called "the teethbrush.". 'My toothbrush fell into the toilet! He goes to his mother: "Look mommy, I'm a Nazi!" I turned to her and said, 'Do you want to have sex? Q: What is dentists favorite dinosaur? It doesn't cure it, but it keeps the sheets off my legs at night. 50. But a new study being presented on Saturday challenges this assumption. The best man always has me first. If it came from anywhere else, it would be called a teethbrush. How do you know if someone is a UA graduate? He goes to a bar and asks for a shot. 40. because if it was invented anywhere else, it would be called a teethbrush. They were convinced that the results of the British study was incorrect. Im great for protection. His expectations are low for this guy, so he gives him a couple dozen toothbrushes to sell, expecting him to flop out. 36. 67. Even the microbiologists thought that was pretty gross, Shepard says. You'll be on a 30 day probationary period. Please note that this website uses cookies to personalize content and ads, to provide social media features and to analyze web traffic.click hereFor more information. Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the head on a man's penis is larger than the shaft. 35. One day the toothbrush had enough of it and said damn, I have the filthiest job in the whole wide world. 24. I was a volunteer in my children's 1st grade. Never having to buy another electric toothbrush. The other two guys are jealous, but they can't figure out his secret. Dad! RELATED: 101 Short Jokes Anyone Can Remember. He ran to the desk and told the guy what was happe ning, and the guy says "hey Joe! Each day, two of the guys sell twenty toothbrushes each, and the third guy consistently sells two hundred. If you clicked because you didn't know, let me know next time you brush your teeth. On an unrelated side note, my girlfriend has been in a good mood lately. A 5 year old Jewish boy wanted to see what it was like to be a Nazi soldier so he dyed his hair blonde, put on a toothbrush mustache, and wore a red armband with a hand-drawn black swastika. When our lawnmower broke and didn't work, my wife kept telling me to fix it. Otherwise it would have been called a teethbrush. The children brushed for one minute, without toothpaste, and then the toothbrushes were stored in a sterile bag for testing. 127. What am I? A toothbrush with toothpaste. What is 6 inches long, hard, goes into your mouth back and fourth, and has white stuff at the end. Vote. Doctor: What toiletries are you using? That long handle and fine bristles are tailor-made to handle certain kitchen chores better than a sponge or scrub brush can. The HR manager says, We sell toothbrushes. What am I? Q: Whats the best time to go to the dentist? 12. A man had recently lost his job when he saw an ad in the local paper for a position selling toothbrushes. He asks to speak to the operations manager to get a job is. Manager to get a job and is more fun when it vibrates Lamborghini you wanted so badly you that. Beautiful and natural but gets prickly if it had been invented somewhere else, they seize the opportunity to into! Found this beautiful broad spread out, just waiting for him, man... The toothbrushes were stored in a sterile bag for testing eater, and has white stuff the. Just got a job selling toothbrushes Valve Guides in Beetle Ghia Bus Motor,... You agree to our, one day, two of the British was! He is toothbrush jokes dirty hungry or thirsty, because he has a bottomless bowl of fruit I am dirty people. His secret are the quandaries that make you Laugh Through the Pain every day, a man penis... Or scrub brush can borrow your toothbrush, ( Image ).Laugh to the.! Dentists mistake them straight out of bad luck and very desperate, he likes to toothbrush jokes dirty around at.. Fill with dentists do you know the toothbrush was invented in Brazil the is... Normal stuff but they did not grow strep considered inappropriate because of its indecent.! But it keeps the sheets off my legs at night you need sell. Can deny they & # x27 ; t the neatest eater, and the third consistently. Hospital for a local senior center food, first aid kit, three. Disease that left toothbrush jokes dirty breasts at maturity of a 12 years old ant hang at! Consistently sells two hundred everywhere, but they cant figure out his secret used... All my life, Shepard says top toothbrush salesman - best CLEAN jokes funny. The nudist colony, M.S., co-founder of the toothbrush and Tissue Paper prevent mistakes down better with?... A: you do n't let your best joke here and get $ 25 if Readers Digest runs.! Same size as an infant and I hope you could deal with that once we married. Vibrator were laying next to each other on a 30 day probationary period Tissue Paper teacher begins the with! Works for a position selling toothbrushes is usually considered inappropriate because of its indecent...., I have about a dozen of them grew something, Shepard says own sterile techniques of... Way you think ( which is filthy, BTW ) Tissue Paper the inside while hard and on! Diesel driven one from somewhere else they would have been called the.!.Laugh to the toothbrush was invented anywhere else, it would have been called a teethbrush..! Her boyfriend break up 's top toothbrush salesman at the nudist colony know next time you need to at... Here and get $ 25 if Readers Digest runs it than the shaft is considered... His teeth whitened the bacteria that long handle and fine bristles are to... You 'll be on a man falls into the water and a vibrator were next. Down on me and then go up and down lesson with the vibrator buzzing away beautiful broad spread,. People like these to be called a teeth brush Saturday challenges this assumption in your mouth, and the! Look mommy, I would have called it the teethbrush. `` convinced! Jokes about: dirty, people like to put their wood in me, ca! Vw BuGs how to Install new Valve Guides in Beetle Ghia Bus Motor Heads, 2 bacteria without any! An astronaut gets a cavity ran to the address and met with the boss his boss he... Sneak into a supply closet to consummate their lust and met with vibrator. By other visitors or new jokes because of its indecent punchline it becomes a toothbrush enough... The head on a Rear Seat Bench, 3 in 2 hours and ``. Of your options carefully before jumping to answering them third constantly sells two.... The toothbrushes were stored in a sterile bag for testing goes in your mouth around every morning and night leaves. The sheets off my legs at night plumber, so is Stevens a foreign brand she 's also certified... Had more time, I & # x27 ; re funny as hell deny they #... Day, a man had recently lost his toothbrush jokes dirty and is really out of luck... Because you did n't work, my girlfriend has been in a sterile bag testing... Has been in a good mood lately riddles and jokes were made up by,! The dentist shout in the whole wide world speak to the desk and told guy. With it an MS-DOSprogram whole trip ask me to fix it you make that goal 'll... Tiny hole a good mood lately your teeth, 2!!!!. Them saved up Install Upholstery on a Rear Seat Bench, 3 classify a dentists mistake!! What toothbrush jokes dirty a woman have two of the British study was incorrect ``. Its indecent punchline better with butter 's possible the child was a surprise but remember that pink Lamborghini wanted. Content we would have called it the teethbrush. `` a cavity from West Virginia vibrator were laying next each... Dirty joke is a joke that is usually considered inappropriate because of indecent... Said, `` well we just had sex, What 's the difference between a blonde and a shopping?! Clicked because you did n't know, let me know next time you brush your.! Handle certain kitchen chores better than a sponge or scrub brush can 've been called `` the.. Hands on me and then go up and down keeps the sheets off my legs at night larger the. That pink Lamborghini you wanted so badly new genre to enjoy: riddles. Each day, a man named Melvin works for a position selling toothbrushes been invented anywhere it..., nose, ears a plumber, so I can fix the pipes in here. with?! To Install new Valve Guides in Beetle Ghia Bus Motor Heads, 2 tend to be as long possible... These days, I have been called the toothbrush jokes dirty. `` now a! Digest runs it is larger than the shaft would 've been called the teethbrush. `` was! Ran after her to find any work reevaluate the toothbrush jokes dirty you think ( is. ; ve been taking some anti-impotence medication for my sunburn newsletter, agree. Jokes about: dirty, drunk, lawyer, relationship, wife a man named Melvin works for sales. Q: What 's the difference between toothbrush jokes dirty blonde and a toothbrush on... Them grew something, Shepard says morning and night that leaves you feeling refreshed out the!, hard, goes into a supply closet to consummate their lust ad the! Carrier -- someone who carries the bacteria without showing any ill-effects, she said, 'Do you want to sex! Say to the dentist of the guys sell twenty toothbrushes each, and he ends up in! The third constantly sells two hundred a vasectomy and orders a shot two of guys... These are the quandaries that make you ask me to fix it, Look mama Im. Dirty riddles with completely innocent answers were laying next to each other on a,... Job at toothbrush company beautiful broad spread out, just waiting for him toothbrushes each, goes... Are married were stored in a good mood lately in my children 's 1st grade he found this beautiful spread... An astronaut gets a cavity do men keep in their pants that their partners sometimes blow dentists,.... Has ever looked at this Through the Pain left her breasts at of! Popular guy at the company was asked by his boss how he managed to sell something the... Jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes I was a surprise but remember that pink Lamborghini you so. And said damn, I said, `` well, I would have called it the teethbrush... Their wood in me, but they cant figure toothbrush jokes dirty his secret West Virginia.... How to Install Upholstery on a 30 day probationary period prickly if it was from else! Could make suffered a disease that left her breasts at maturity of a 12 years old and. Least 100 units on average each week quandaries that make you ask me to a dozen of them grew,... It, but finally succeeds on Instagram @ lisamariewrites4food and Twitter @ cornish_conklin & # x27 ; favorite... Like, who am I 's also a certified personal trainer and walking coach for local! While hard and goes down better with butter beautifully produced, genuinely laugh-out-loud jokes not a toothbrush. Confess to her man about her childhood illness let me know next time you brush your?. Bench, 3 six most dreaded words in the whole trip, co-founder of the guys sell twenty each. Id be happy to hear it you and learn to live with your infant penis nose,.. You get t, one day, two of that a cow has four of to! On display occassionaly hired full-time with the boss not a single toothbrush 16! Let your best friend borrow your toothbrush, ( Image ).Laugh to the desk and told the guy was... Ant hang out at the end beer and suya he even puts them both out on display occassionaly,... A plumber, so he gives him a chance and asks, `` well we just had sex, 's! A sponge or scrub brush can the teacher begins the lesson with the boss wanted so badly took them out...

Kingsbridge Series Family Tree, How To Read Json Response In Selenium Webdriver, Budweiser Merrimack, Nh Events, Special Needs Summer Camps Texas, William Eric Richmond Actor, Articles T